19 August 2009

1.. If you have no friends, I pity you and if you have I pity them.
Ans: And I pity you for wasting your pity on both the pitiable and the non-pitiable.

2. Why is it that I already know which film of yours I should watch and which I should not?
Ans: That’s because you are a Genius Sir!

3. You will be remembered in the history of Indian cinema for what you are.
Ans: I really don’t care about being remembered. I just want to be what I am and I will be what I want to be.

4. A wise man won’t repeat his mistakes.
Ans: Unless you make mistakes you don’t become wise and unless you continue making mistakes you won’t become wiser. Now come on answer this, wise man!

5. You should be put in a zoo.
Ans: Yeah! That will be a good thing for the critics as then they can stop writing reviews and just throw stones at me.

6. Do you agree that ‘Truth is God’?
Ans: Well, most of the time telling truth is what puts us in hell and from then on we scream at God for help.

7. If marriages are made in heaven where are divorces made?
Ans: Wisdom land.

8. How do you differentiate between Love and Lust?
Ans: Lust is Pure and Truthful and Love is Subjective and cannot be Trusted.

9. Why can’t you be soft in your words?
Ans: You must be joking. Even if I strike my words with a hammer into peoples heads most of their skulls are too thick to let anything get in ever.

10. Why do I love you?
Ans: The day I completely figure out why I love myself I will give a thought to why you also would be stupid enough to love me. Ok baby?

11. I think it’s because of your attitude towards women that you ended up alone without a woman in your life.
Ans: No Sir. My attitude is the reason why I ended up with so many women in my life.

12. How to reach a state of complete moral indifference like you did?
Ans: Very simple. Just strip the clothes off morality and study its nakedness in a way different from what you have been told to.

13. No matter what anyone says you are Superb.
Ans: Whether I am Superb or not, I do not care for what anyone says.

14. Are you really proud of what you do?
Ans: Are you really proud of what you do?

15. I always feel lost after reading your blog.
Ans: Let me assure you that no one is going to waste time finding you.

16. Thanks Ramu! But my name is Vaishak.
Ans: What’s in a name Vaishak? Just call me Shyamu once and we can call it quits.

17. If you try to analyze “the whole” by breaking it into pieces you might loose “the whole”.
Ans: Brilliant.

18. Emotions dominate logic.
Ans: I also know that, Sir. All I am saying is that if we can learn to control our emotions through our logic we can relish our emotions better.

19. What do you mean by saying we constantly get victimized by the negative effects of our programming?
Ans: We live all our lives in a conflict between wanting to and having to. Between these two is guilt and why we feel bad about our guilt is the negative effect of programming.

20. My sister says your philosophy is like you are manipulating someone at a saree shop to buy a saree one does not want to.
Ans: She is wrong. I am not into selling sarees. I attempt to take off the sarees.

21. The way you questioned your friends is silly…. Really silly… super silly.
Ans: OK Mr.Sillier.

22. I hope you have this courage and strength till your last breath.
Ans: Only when you don’t care about having breaths will you get courage and strength.

23. What’s the difference between a pessimist and an optimist?
Ans: The Optimist invents the Airplane. The Pessimist invents the Parachute. The inbetweenist will stay on the ground and talk about the faults of both.

24. As humans we need purpose of living.
Ans: The purpose of life is to live life. To feel alive is what truly life is about. Most people who are alive actually are living dead.

25. Have you ever f**ked up unknowingly?
Ans: No. Most of my f**k ups I did knowingly. The thing is that you will only know that it’s a f**k up after you f**ked up. So till you know it’s a f**k up we will all happily believe that it’s going to be a f**k.

26. How do you deal with guilt?
Ans: I don’t get affected by it, because guilt is the ultimate programming effect ever thrust upon us and I de-programmed myself from that disease ever since I got inoculated with a vaccine of wisdom.

27. I can’t understand what you are?
Ans: Atleast why don’t you try to understand why you should even bother to understand me.

28. Don’t keep giving us your gyan.
Ans: This blog here is neither meant to teach nor to create a mindset. I speak only for myself and for whoever is out there who is smart enough and stupid enough to listen to me. The choice of you listening to me rests with you and not with me. My real down going is that I am even making an effort.

“Zarathustra went into the mountains and spent ten long years in a cave in his solitude. However one morning he came out of the cave, stood before the rising sun and spoke thus unto it.

‘Oh great star what would be thy happiness if not for those whom you shine. For ten long years you climbed hither unto my cave. You would have wearied of your journey if not for me. Like thee I must descend into the deep like thou doest in the evening to give light unto the nether world.
I am burdened with my wisdom like a bee that hath gathered too much honey.
I need hands outstretched to take it and in turn make me lighter and brighter.
I would give away and distribute, until the wise once again become joyous in their foolishness’.

Thus began Zarathustra’s down going”. – Friedrich Nietzsche (Thus spake Zarathustra)

Well guys, I never said I am not a megalomaniac. I think no end of myself. I am selfish and debauched. I am highly egoistic, self obsessed etc and you guys are free to add any other adjectives you can think of and I am super fine with that.

P.S: Was just Joking. I don’t think I am as baaaaaaaaad as how I described myself just now but Yes I am definitely Baaaad. BYE!

Other articles by Ram Gopal Varma:
Programme F**k ups
My reaction to reactions (16 Aug 2009)
My reaction to reactions (12 Aug 2009)
The real HoRROR (about Agyaat reviewers)
Lock-up lessons
My reaction to reactions
The Psychological aspect of BGM

Note: Thanks to Ram Gopal Varma for giving us special permission to republish his blogs in idlebrain.com (visit rgvzoomin.com to visit Ram Gopal Varma's blog)